Monday 8 November 2010

Big Apes don’t play Quidditch

 

Those readers who have read the Harry Potter saga , total or partially, are surely familiar to quidditch, the most popular sport in the magic world where the full story happens.

Two teams, one against the other, each one with the objective to score more points on the rival’s goal than the other.  Similar in principle to rugby, American football, basketball or soccer.

There is an important difference, though: Quidditch is played with four balls simultaneously.

First there is a quaffle, which is the biggest one. Players are supposed to pass this ball through three different rings at one of the field ends, which are the rival’s goal. Each time a team succeeds, they get 10 points.

Then there are two bludgers, a bit smaller than the quaffle. These two are used by one team players to beat, harass and distract the other team players, and make it more difficult for them to score with the quaffle. Two specific players have special bats to hit the bludgers against the other team.

And finally there is the smallest one, called golden snitch. It is the size of an iPod shuffle, and has two fast wings. It floats ans wanders around erratically, and one special player of each team, called the Seeker, has to be the first to catch it. Once it is caught, the match ends, and the team whose seeker got it gets a 150 point bonus.

If quidditch were played without a snitch, it would not be fundamentally different from other similar sports we mentioned before, would it? Indeed, as you might have guessed, it is the snitch that really makes the difference, for it depends almost on a simple flash of genius from the Seeker to strike a 150 points bonus and determine the end of the match.

Both teams will normally score regular points with the quaffle. Both teams will me more or less lucky in harassing the contrary with bludgers. But it is just one team which will get the snitch. Just one.

And this is the situation where Big Ape’s Microsoft is about Windows Phone 7. But his problem is that he still is thinking rugby, or basket, football or soccer, and he’s not understood that there is a snitch around that needs to be caught and really make a difference. If he just thinks quaffles, his team might score. But the other team certainly will too. As a matter of fact, if he plays against iPhone, Android, Blackberry or old-glory Nokia, these have already scored a heck lot of regular points more than he has. And the two first competitors of his have already seen the snitch and are moving their seekers towards it.

And, we are afraid, the only bright and shiny little thing floating over at Microsoft’s camp is his polished sweaty head top when he jumps across the scenery like a gorilla on caffeine overdose.

too much coffee, isn’t it, Big Ape?

Footnote: This post is dedicated by Sirius to Percy, Luna, Neville, Hermione, McGonagall, Hagrid, Draco, Rita Skeeter and even Bellatrix… you (should) know who you are…

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